The shame

I fuss at everyone else for failing and falling and then the very next day I let you all down. And not just one day, but two!

To my loyal readers - I apologize. I've been dealing with drama at work and the last thing after work I feel like is coming home to stare at a computer even more.

I'm seriously beginning to wonder how many years will be shaved of the life of my eyes by staring at computer monitors. And I don't get a break - it's my job. I mean, I suppose I could try a typewriter, but if I didn't have those little Backspace and Delete keys, the time I'd spend sniffing the white out as I'd have 10-12 coats per page.... and there would go my nose. So eyes or nose - what's more important? I'd like to see the statistics on that one...

Moving on... I know this goes against my in-laws and my husband's point of view - but why can't the Mavs pull out a win already?!? I'm cheering for my home team and we've been within one game now for too long. Just shut up with the excuses and beat 'em already!!! If I wanted to see drama all the time, I could switch it over to the reruns of Law & Order...

Next... I'm seriously considering selling my dogs off to the gypsies. I love them, but don't need a cold wet nose in the middle of everything all the time. Maybe I won't sell them off... but some sort of sedative drug might come in handy. Nothing to ever hurt them, just calm them down and get their little butts to stop running all over the place like a herd of buffalos running throughout the house.

And, saving the best for last... Did you know that according to the Anniversary gift list, the 'traditional' gift you give for a fourth wedding anniversary is fruit and flowers? Seriously, we've put up with one another for this long, 1,461 days of wedded bliss, and I'm suppose to give and receive FRUIT?!? And then, I say "forget tradition" and look for the 'modern' gift list... the fourth year 'modern' gift is freakin' appliances! After all, nothing say 'I love you' more than a coffee maker, toaster oven or washer & dryer set.

So my parting question for the day... Who comes up with these lame ideas? And where do I go to apply for the job? I know I can some up with something better than stinkin' fruit and appliances. Now, I know, the better gifts are saved for the 'big' anniversaries - like 25 and 50. But come on! There's more out there than fruit and appliances.

"Here Hun, this is for you. To celebrate our love I want you to have this beautiful little kumquat. May it's roundness and sweetness sustain you through the next year of our wedded life.

"But not only this kumquat, you deserve more. So, take this French-door, stainless finish, energy-star compliant refrigerator. May it's cool sleek frame keep you cool on those long hot nights. And may it always keep your food to the perfect temperature."